Dear chelloh,
things are hard right now, and they seem to just be a big blurry mess. but i don't blame you for any of it. i know this is both of our faults so i don't expect you to say or do anything. i know that we are trying to fix all the screwed up things in our lives right now, and i hope we do get to make everything all better again.
i am only truly happy when i am with you. your presence just lights up my world. everything i am and everything i have is dependant upon you.
i am sorry for the way i have mistreated you in the past and i know you are sorry for mistreating me. we can be happy together if we work everything out, which i think we will.
you are everything to me and i love you with all my heart. i hope i can learn to open up to you and let you know how i feel. i also hope that you will be able to recognize when something is wrong. but no matter what we do or where we go, i will love you. i will always love you, baby. you mean the world to me, and i hope that things will go back to normal.
love always,
richard